Shadowdancer

an e-zine series by Ambika

 


Joćo Ricardo Spagnollo - Formacao

 

 

Read the Shadowdancer series from the beginning! 

 

 

Series 1: Warrior Emerging 

 

Chapter 17
 

 

Hours after his return to the Center, both Commander Thom and Daphne were basking in the afterglow of their lovemaking. Their bodies, clothed in a white sheet, softly spooned each other in a weary embrace, safe from the outside world. Both of them were still awake, with different thoughts streaming through their minds.

Daphne was still distressed over Thom’s violent reaction toward Eric Anderson. It was the first time she had been acquainted with her husband’s fury. It scared her for many reasons, one being her own safety. If he found out she had watched him on Zepher’s monitors, or that she was continuing her library work for the community, would he react the same towards her? She kept her inner turmoil at bay, trying to pacify her own fears by gently stroking her husband’s strong arms as he held her close from behind. She still did love him, though. She knew if she did have the courage to leave him he might destroy her with the same intensity as he loved her. She had nothing else but him to lean on…she turned her face towards his, feeling his warm, heavy breath on her cheek.

“I missed you so much,” she told Thom. 

“I missed you too,” he answered.

“Was the kidnapping successful?”

“Yeah baby, it was. Although that boy did give us some trouble with his biting and scratching…he’s in the Quiet Room now, resting.”

“Did anything else happen at the house?” she asked him. This would be his chance to set the record straight, she reasoned to herself. 

“Nothing else…the transaction was surprising peaceful,” he told her calmly, with a straight face. His eyes showed no signs of remorse. You are a liar, you bastard, Daphne thought as her smile remained strong, never faltering from his gaze. It was not the time to confront him. She answered, “Good, Honey. Let’s go to sleep.” As she turned her back to him once more, Daphne knew that she would never completely trust him again.

In that same moment, Thom had some misgivings about his wife’s possible reaction to his dilemma -- she was not enough sexually for him anymore. Since that fateful night his fingers traced the nude image of Frieda Anderson on the monitors several weeks ago, he knew that he needed more sex. But he also knew that Daphne was a busy woman with her projects, and even though he never had any complaint about her technique in bed, he still wanted more, some variety with another woman.

If she knew, she would leave me, and then I would kill myself, he thought. Daphne was monogamous, and a jealous woman. He would have to lie to her to get what he wanted, which pained him. How can I do this without causing her suspicion?

Suddenly, an idea came to him. Instantly he whispered in her ear, “Daphne, are you still awake?”

“Yes…barely,” she answered, her voice muffled. Her face was against a pillow. 

“I need to get your opinion on something. Can you sit up?”

“Sure, just a second,” Daphne answered, yawning. She pulled herself up slowly, bringing the sheet up to cover her chest from the cold air in the room. “What’s up?” 

“I was observing today when the men were bringing the boy inside…”

“The boy’s name is Gareth, Thom,” she told him.

“Right…anyway, Gareth was acting up and giving them a real hard time as they carried him away. Perhaps because he isn’t used to many men?”

“What do you mean?” Daphne answered as she stretched her arms over her head, relieving some tension.

“I mean that Gareth is not used to people except his family, like his mother and sister,” he explained.

“You forgot Eric, his older brother,” she informed him.

“Oh yeah, right…” Thom nodded his head. He had no guilt for striking him earlier. What was done was done. Thom continued, “As I was saying, maybe what Gareth needs is a woman to handle him and take notes on his drawings…so he wouldn’t act out as much.”

Daphne considered this, “Thom, the child’s autistic. He can react violently at any time, at males and females,” she pointed out.

“I know that, dear. Just hear me out, okay? I believe that he can calm down with a woman around, so we can find out what we want until his sister comes to get him. In this case, we would have some valuable background information for our benefit, so when Frieda arrives, we could use the information to our advantage…” he said.

“And then we could eventually find out Dr. Anderson’s whereabouts more quickly,” she told him.

“Exactly. You’ve read my mind. You are so clever, and that’s why I’m crazy for you,” Thom said as she held her close. During their embrace, he was thankful that she didn’t actually sense his underlying plan for bedding the new research assistant, whoever she was.

Daphne however had an idea of her own. Still locked in their embrace, she asked Thom, “Honey…what if I could be your assistant?”

Shit. What can I say to her? He forgot that Daphne was always so enthusiastic in helping him with research. Sweat started to wet his brow.

“Did you hear me, Thom? I would be happy to help you keep an eye on Gareth,” she offered. 

“Uh…that’s so sweet of you,” he flustered. She let go of him, giving him a concerned look, stroking the right side of his face lovingly.

“Are you all right?” she asked Thom. Suddenly his eyes brightened with another plan. Smiling, he answered, taking her hands into his, “Yes, I’m fine. I was just thinking about the possibility, and thank you. But,” he stopped to sigh, his eyes softening for bad news: “I will need an individual who is knowledgeable with children and interpreting art, and besides, you are so busy with your other responsibilities…”

“I know some stuff about art, and it’s your fault that we don’t have children. You told me you didn’t even like children, and did not care that I wasn’t able to have any,” she told him, surprised by his reason. Both of Daphne’s ovaries were non-functioning due to an undetected virus she had had when she was a teenager living in China. By the time her parents could save the money for the X-Ray, it was too late. 

“I did not mean it like that…I thought since you have a hard time distinguishing Debussy’s paintings from Pollock’s, it might pose a problem,” he tried to defend himself. 

“Wait a second…Debussy wasn’t a painter. He was a music composer,” she answered.

“Really?”

“Yes. You probably meant Monet,” she corrected him. 

“I’m sorry. Anyway, your grand knowledge of music is not needed in this particular situation. Name one painting Monet did.”

“Ummm… 'The Raft of Medusa?'” she guessed.

“Not even close,” he told her. That work was created in the 17th century. Monet was in the 19th century.”

“So who painted 'The Raft of Medusa' then?” Daphne loved to put him on the spot. 

Apologetically he grinned, “I don’t remember,” he admitted, shaking his head. Daphne giggled. He continued, “But we need to find a woman who could answer that question without having to spend precious time looking up the correct answer. She needs to think on her feet, especially with handling Gareth. Do you understand?”

“Yes, I do. I just wanted to help,” she answered, hanging her head slightly, which made Thom feel sorry. He took his hand and lifted her chin up to meet his eyes.

“I know, Daphne. Both of us are so busy, and I wanted to give you a break from another project, that’s all,” he told her. Will she believe me? Thom wondered. 

She looked at him, trying to hold back her growing disappointment. She wanted to still be involved, if she was not able to do the actual work. She then asked, “Okay. I will let you do this, only on one condition.”

“Anything.”

“Let me find her.”

He sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought, but he knew he had no choice.

“Daphne, it’s a deal. You will start tomorrow morning,” Thom informed her. This was not the plan he had imagined. He didn’t want them to meet each other. As she hugged him, his chest grew weary. But he had no guilt about what he had planned for the new assistant.

 

To be Continued… 


 
 
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Biographical Information: Ambika is a woman-on-the-go in her late twenties, juggling two jobs, graduate school at the University of Oklahoma and her creative/activist workings. She earned a BA from Bethany College (Lindsborg, KS - 1994) in Music. "I still consider myself a musician even though I am not performing these days. Every day music still rouses me up and sparks me creatively and mentally." Ambika started to write in 1996, chronicling the hurts and disappointments that had haunted her in the past, thus keeping her private monsters at bay. "First I wrote about pain because that's all I knew, now I write of joy." She writes poetry, short stories and music lyrics and has published several of her poems in school and independent poetry collections.

When she's not working, going to library school, writing, singing and/or battling dark moods, she dances. "I started meditative dance in July 2001, and I was changed for the better. Now I am aware of my body, have fantastic visions, and have progressed as a human being mentally, spiritually, and physically. It is my religion." This "alternative librarian-to-be" currently resides in the town of her birth, Norman, OK with her grandparents. She enjoys traveling, animals, meditation and nature. She is also a member of The DreamSpinners elemental dance group and the Xeebrix performance group.


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