There are moments when worlds crash into each other with such force that the beginning and the end of everything are exactly the same for one, two, three breathless moments. As the human guy fell with a crater through his head, and Kora was knocked down by a branch, all I could think was, “which one of these fucking freaks should I shoot first?” That thought was rapidly followed by, “oh my fucking god, its
Sheridan and Kora! What the fuck are they doing here?”
I fell to my knees, shaking. That was the best I could do under the circumstances. Everyone was screaming all around me. I heard my name one, two, thirty-three times. All I could do was kneel and shake my head. I felt like I was deep underwater. I could barely breathe. Somewhere in the back of my chest my
mother kicked me. She kicked the damn breath out of me. I threw up hard, all over someone’s feet. The world went black before my eyes for what seemed like an hour, but was probably only 3 minutes, because when I finally looked up, everyone was pretty much in the same place they had been when I went down.
Sheridan and Kora, surrounded by a bunch of humans, were retreating back into the trees. My guys were shouting at each other to stop. Obviously the ‘intruders’ were of my race. They were clearly unarmed. Any warrior worth their salt could tell they posed no threat, and these guys were all warriors worth their salt.
Sheridan kept shouting my name. Finally, I was able to look at his face. He was horrified, confused, filled with conflicting emotions.
“I’m sorry,” I said quietly.
“Some good that’ll do the dead guy!” my mother shouted from beneath the glacier where my heart had been. I could not remember the last time I’d felt its warm, comforting rhythm in my chest.
“It isn’t my fault,” I yelled.
That caused the stream of events boiling madly around me to come to a halt, as though I was the fulcrum upon which the madness turned.
Everyone was looking at me. I realized with a start that I was naked and covered in blood. So were the rest of my gang.
“Your gang!” my mother taunted. “That is what you have become – the misfit leader of a mob, a gang, a set of thugs! I taught you better than that, or so I thought!”
For some reason, imaginary mom stung me to the root of my thoughts.
I looked out from her jibes into Sheridan’s hot blue eyes. I got the distinct impression he couldn’t decide whether he wanted to save me or leave me to rot among the hooligans still circling around me.
I looked up at Xal. He was watching me expectantly. He was waiting for me to get up and take the initiative, like I had been doing for days now, or was it weeks. I could no longer get a grip on time or events. I was swollen and misshapen inside as a bloated corpse. I no longer recognized myself.
“Who are these beings?” Xal asked. “They look to be of your kind. We must know why they are here. We must understand what has happened, because now, there is blood between us and them. And if they are yours and you are theirs, then there is blood between you and us as well.”
“I am theirs,” I said blankly. “But, you did not know. You did not know!” I almost yelled.
“No, we did not, but that is no excuse,” Xal said mournfully. “Blood is blood. It is one of our most sacred laws. The blood of the living is sacrosanct. Those who shed it must pay in kind.”
A huge stroke of heat and light slashed through my throbbing brain. “Was this a law when the Purics offed their women?” I almost shouted.
“It was,” Xal growled.
“How did things come to this pass?” I asked out loud to no one in particular.
Sheridan shouted my name again. The rest of my human friends joined him.
I stood up and walked toward him, still naked, still covered in the blood of those I had helped kill.
I stopped ten paces away from my own kind. Sheridan looked me up and down. Complete bafflement flickering between moments of absolute contempt shot from his eyes, blasted me until again, I could hardly breathe. “Have you completely lost your mind?” he finally shouted.
“I have,” I said, honestly, simply.
Xal walked up behind me, put one of his immense gray hands on my shoulder protectively.
“Sanity and insanity bundled up into one inexplicable package,” Sheridan replied sardonically.
Xal said, “Can you understand me?”
“What did he say?” Sheridan asked hotly.
“No,” I said to Xal, “they can’t understand you. Perhaps a translation device, like the one you gave me, would help.”
I turned back to Sheridan, “He asked if you understand what he says. I explained that you do not. They can give you communication devices to help with that. I’m pretty sure they don’t have any on them at the moment.”
“They don’t seem to have much of anything except blood on at the moment,” Sheridan growled. “Interesting company you’ve been keeping. I heard about
Zygon and Pon.”
That almost shook me to my knees again. “How…how….how,” was all I could manage to stutter.
“The frakking Beni. They limped back home to the Morah and somehow talked themselves back into their good graces. They are why we know what happened to you and your two renegade pals. For some bizarre reason we all thought you might want rescuing, or some such nonsense. Seems like you’re fitting right in with the bullshit though.”
“Fitting in with the frakking bullshit,” inner mom growled. “Yeah, fitting in quite well!”
With that, my chest caved in. I fell into the gaping hole where my life had once been. I let myself crumple to the ground for the second time that day. My eyes did not greet the light of day again for a blessed, long while.
