The Prime Minister
a serial novel
 

by Rattan Mann
 
 
 

 Linda Allison -- The Beginning and the End

 

 

	Web www.oraculartree.com

Go to Part 1, Episode 1
Go to Part 2, Episode 1
 

Welcome to the final episode of The Prime Minister. This last episode is dedicated to Colonel Yash Pal Sirohi.

 

 

Hindi Terms

 

Lulu: is a useless nut who can never get anything straight. It is not a name in the usual sense.

 

Chachi Jaan: is a more respectful term for aunty. Chacha and chachi mean uncle and aunty and Jaan, meaning life, adds more honour to the term. It means "aunty, my life". It is not a name in the usual sense.

 

Jhuggis: are shanties in a shanty-town, and jhuggi-wallas are those who dwell in the jhuggis. 
 

Previous Episode
 

The strength of the knock was very disturbing. It sounded like the midnight knock. Only Lulu alias Lal Singh banged so loudly. But how could it be Lal Singh? It was just seven o'clock in the evening, and Lal Singh never knocked before midnight. But if it was not Lal Singh, it must be the prostitutes. They were drunk and rowdy again.

The prostitutes couldn't have come at a worse time. But they couldn't have come at a better time either. What was the worst time for Gupta was by definition the best time for Kumar.

God had sent the prostitutes to save Kumar from Gupta. This new hope gave Kumar new life and strength. Kumar had dragged his neck out of the noose. He was coughing violently. If he couldn't scream and make for the door now, he wouldn't be able to do it ever again. With all the strength in his lungs he gave a now-or-never scream as he ran towards the door,

"Bibi, Bibi, come quickly. Help me. Dog Gupta is hanging me. Call the police. Call the pimps. Do something before he kills me.

As he screamed, Kumar flung the door open and raised his arms to embrace Bibi.

His arms froze in mid-air.

There was no Bibi. Instead a tall young man with a long beard and saffron turban stood before him. He had an AK-47 on his shoulders.

"I am General Singh," the man introduced himself very politely.

Kumar was the prince of surprises. But today was not his day. Today he was on the receiving end of everything - even surprises. And what an unpleasant surprise it was - AK-47 staring at his face.

Kumar tried to save the day by deceit and deception. He whined,

"My friend, whoever you are, you are definitely not looking for us. We don't know any General Singh. We are foreign philanthropists. We have come from Europe to save the Indian elephant and tiger. I guess you are looking for Mr.Gupta, our travel-agent. He lives over there. But he is not at home. He has gone out to make arrangements for our safari. Please leave a message and come tomorrow. I will tell him that a very nice young gentleman had come to see him."

The stranger was not impressed by this yarn-spinning.

"I am General Singh alias Brigadier Singh," he said again.

The grand bluff-master tried again to make his way through bluffing. To impress the stranger, he straightened himself up and adopted a more threatening posture as if he was in full command.

"Look friend, I told you we don't know anybody here. I am Professor Holden from Norway, and there inside is Professor Schmidt from Germany. We are both Nobel Prize winners and personal friends of the Indian prime minister. If you don't stop pestering us I will complain to the Indian government. We are both suffering from vomiting and diarrhoea and we wish to rest now. If you don't leave I will call the head of Indian police."

The stranger was still not impressed. The show of strength had no effect on him. It appeared as if he knew very well with whom he was speaking. So he spoke for the third time in the same calm and monotonous voice,

"I am General Singh alias Brigadier Singh alias Colonel Singh."

Kumar had tried everything. He couldn't do much more now. He felt the ground slipping under his feet. Nothing was working for him today. His hangman's noose didn't work. His tricks didn't work. It was definitely not his day. But, there lay a new hope. If it was not his day, it must surely be Gupta's day. If he couldn't fix the stranger, then, by definition, Gupta would. So he turned his head towards Gupta.

"Professor Schmidt, please come here. There is a native here. I don't understand what he is saying. You know these bloody natives better than I do. Please come and deal with this bugger."

That was too much for the stranger. He had had enough of the charade. This time he smiled broadly and said,

"Jai Hind, Kumar sahib. Since when did you start joking so much. Can't you recognize your old buddy, Lulu alias Lal Singh, the Prime Minister?"

Then he gently pushed Kumar aside, and stepped into the room as if he was entering his own house.

Gupta was coming towards the door so they bumped against each other half-way. The bump proved to be more telling than the beard and the turban - Gupta recognized the stranger without so much as looking at him.

"Layak Ram, you rascal, you shameless deserter, what are you doing here? I am putting you under immediate arrest," he shouted with joy as if Layak Ram had come to give him back his lost days of glory.

But this time Layak Ram had come not to give but to take.

"Sir, now they call me Lulu alias Lal Singh, and sir, now we will see who will arrest whom. Please forgive me sir, I have received orders to take both of you with me. Balwinder Singh Mann has some questions for you. They call him Lulu alias Lal Singh too. Sir, nowadays they call everybody Lulu alias Lal Singh, the Prime Minister. I don't know why, sir. I am a simple man and I don't understand a lot in this strange and complicated world awash with everything except Truth and Simplicity."

 

Then Layak Ram saluted Gupta and stood in the corner, waiting for an answer.

Layak Ram had not changed at all. In spite of his speech, beard, and turban, he was still that same old gentle-giant he had always been. Gupta could have asked him to wait outside, and he would have obeyed. Gupta could even have slapped him, and nothing would have happened. But another thing was crystal clear. Layak Ram had come to take them, and come what may, he had no intention of leaving without them because he had his orders to obey. That too was very much like Layak Ram.

The day he had to run away with Balwinder, Layak Ram had been a very angry man. He had remained very angry for a long time. He had wanted to kill Gupta and Kumar because they had separated him from his wife and children forever by forcing him to become a deserter. But anger and hate did not stick too long with Layak Ram. Slowly he stopped being angry. Slowly he stopped hating. Slowly he stopped missing his wife and children, because whenever he missed them he closed his eyes and they were there before him. He started telling his friends that perhaps God wanted him to be separated from his family forever because God wanted to show him what true love is - something that never dies. Just by telling that to his friends he found his inner peace. His friends in the jungle called him a wise man, a giant not of the body but of the soul.

Now as he looked around the Joint-HQ, and saw what he saw, he felt pity for Gupta and Kumar. He even lost the desire to arrest them. He had come to arrest two officers, two other giants like him. He had expected resistance, a brave fight, a desperate gun-battle lasting for hours. But instead of two brave officers willing to sacrifice their lives for their freedom, he found two puppies smeared in shit, urine, and vomit, waiting to be spanked. He wanted to leave, let bygones be bygones, because certain things are best left untouched. But orders are orders. They are sacrosanct. So he saluted Gupta and Kumar again and said in his typical gentle voice,

"Take your own time, sirs. I am in no hurry. But you know sirs, orders are orders."

By the time Gupta and Kumar had washed themselves and were ready to go, it was completely dark outside. So the trio started marching towards the jungle without attracting attention. They looked like soldiers on night patrol. None of them had any desire to speak. Toads and frogs calling for their mates seemed to be the only creatures interested in a conversation. These alluring sounds of romance from the forest deepened the desolation inside them and made it more unbearable.

As they crossed the bushes and entered the jungle, a tall young girl in salwar and kameez suddenly emerged from her hiding and stood in their way with an AK-47 pointing at them. Nobody spoke. As they approached her, she moved aside to give way. Then she started walking behind them with the gun pointed at their backs.

It was too dark to see her face. She could have been mistaken for a beardless Pathan had not her heaving breasts betrayed her sex. Nobody uttered a sound. The cricket calls and their own footsteps conspired to deepen the desolation within. Only a silent unease hopped from soul to soul - creatures marooned on themselves - because nobody felt at ease with that AK-47 pointed at his back - not even Layak Ram.

For the first time in life, Layak Ram had his back turned on an armed intruder whom he did not recognize. He didn't know whether she was a friend or foe, or what she had in mind. This uncertainty began to get on his nerves. Even the silent sounds of the jungle began to explode like a volley of machine-gun fire. Suddenly a wolf howled nearby. That was the last straw for Layak Ram. He couldn't stand the suspense and the spell anymore. He had to break it. So to cast aside the evil spell that had taken hold of his body and soul, he muttered, as if to himself,

"Kumar sahib, meet Kali. I am sure you know her very well. You created her – you created them all!"

The End

 

 

Copyright 2005 Rattan Mann
Oslo, Norway

 

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